pun'kins!

happy halloween, everyone!
i hope the weekend was good and trick-or-treating is better.
nobody's too old to get candy.

hype me on lookbook!

untouched.

a series of untouched shots and unrefined feelings:

i feel lost in translation between the world's language and mine.

lately, i have been depleted of energy and, although i have had more social time, i feel more stressed out. i am exhausted. i do not feel i have enough time to get school applications done to enter an art school by the next fall. i may have to enter at second semester if that's an open opportunity-- if not, i have to wait a full year, during which i will likely be working somewhere in california, as i can't spend much more time in my current town.

i have a to-do list posted next to my bedroom door, and out of the dozen things on it, i have completed one for the past two weeks. i am behind. i am behind.

i believe i have been trying to show that i am striving for greatness so much that i have overwhelmed myself. i have created several different characters, one of which is the hidden, scared, and overloaded girl, and the other of which is the adult who's pushing forward, unafraid and ready to take on everything that's thrown at her. i am a combination of those things, but i still have a lot of weaknesses to take on, and i am currently struggling. i think it's time to show that i'm still trying these wings out; i'm trying to take off, but i'm not quite there. i am so, so close-- i can feel it. it scares me, but i can feel that pull to get out, to move. besides, i am moving forwards, emotionally and mentally, even spiritually. i just haven't moved locations. yet.

i'm just shedding my old skin.

more to come soon.

gray day.

fashion, music, and midwest boredom-- low-quality-i-can't-edit-or-make-movies photobooth style.

music: teenage crime (axwell remix) -adrian lux

falling whistles.

a gradual midwest fall layering and a heavy story:

i'm not sure why i haven't written about this before.

about this time last year, i stumbled upon a website that struck me full-on. it described the democratic republic of congo and the horrors seen on warfronts there, but most importantly, it described the closer details of the relationship between a charity volunteer and five teenage boys rescued from war prisons.

it described how, after rounds of torture, young ones would be placed at the front of the soldiers and given nothing but a whistle. the objective would be for the children to make enough noise to scare off the enemy and, when that failed, to take the first round of bullets... with their bodies.

falling whistles was created as a non-profit symbol for peace in the face of the terrible happenings in congo. besides straight donations, necklaces may be purchased to wear over the heart.

anyone can help from anywhere by supporting the falling whistles campaign. anyone can find compassion.

"it is not down in any map. true places never are." -herman melville